Loose lips sink ships, and this is a cannon. Revised and edited.

If she can’t tell u, allow me to enlighten you. First things first, I initially rebuked and spurned her advances towards me, telling her it was a bad Idea, she was flirting nonstop, I again told her to drop it, but then I started to feel for her so I stopped turning her away.

The first time we hooked up it was a passionate affair, hormones and physical attraction were at a peak, my heart was growing soft and my nether-regions hard. I thought She wasn’t my type, I was wrong. That girl was a freak, she was adventurous and she had My undivided attention.

Unlike her partner at the time, I treated her with respect, and above all I genuinely cared and actively sought out how her day was and what the best part of it is, she always told me it was getting to be with me, playing chess or feeding the ducks, our drives together, Holding hands and making out at the stop lights.

Soon after we started having a passionate , emotional and physical affair, we felt things get deeper. All we wanted to do was count down the hours until we were alone to hold each other and explore our bodies, to pick our brains and challenge one another mentally. She brought out aspects in myself I thought I had lost. Compassion, selflessness, and above all, a genuine connection  to another human who accepted me for me.

It was about a week after we started hooking up her already crumbling relationship started to break down even further, her other half getting jealous over the amount of time we spent together, the clothes she wore and her make up. The drives we took to get away from him to have a quick make out session in the car park down the road, hell, if he looked out the window when we got back, he would have seen us snogging in the car.

So at some stage, after he grants her a hall pass and forbids her to use it on me, she confides all her dramas, her insecurities and how she’s actually feeling about her relationship. The lengths of his abuse, screaming at her, calling her a retard at work, in front of staff and customers. So I decided to step up and treat her right. Small things, seeds for the garden she wants, Lactose free milk and her special bread when she runs out, hot chocolate and Milo, the simple things her “better half” neglects.

So comes the day when we finally decide to sleep together for the first time. Its 6am, she wakes me up when he walks out the door , then from there, we proceed to a make out session where things took a turn for the better and she invites me into her bedroom.

I mean I’m so excited and nervous, my heart is racing, I can barely think and one of my fantasies is coming true. I always thought about it, even before we had anything going but I never pursued it until now. I didn’t want to lower her opinion of me, nor me of her but we couldn’t take it anymore, so we gave in and we had our way with each other on her bed. It was a little squeaky so we were sneaky and did it from behind, Bent over, arms wrapped, linked like snakes and feeling every stroke, every breath she took, every moan she made.

A few days later we repeated the process, this time old mate and her “better half” were at work together and we didn’t have to hold back, she took a firm lead, followed by a firm something else and before we knew it, a couple of hours had passed and we collapsed in a heap. When “better half” returned, he asked her if she went back to sleep when he left, she said no. He asked why the bed was messed up, she told him she was moving washing around. I couldn’t help but wink at her, he just missed it.

I think he started to clue on after that, perhaps he noticed the “just-a-little-too-tight-for-me-you-limp-dick-fuck” condoms were mysteriously being depleted while he slaved flipping burgers at Mickey D’s, or the lube was in the wrong spot when he got home, maybe he could taste me on her lips when they kissed, either way we continued our sordid affair when we told each other our feelings were getting serious.

We go for a walk, I tell her I want her to Leave him because I couldn’t do this anymore, I was in over my head and she kept me coming back for more. She told me she wanted to be with me too , to make it work somehow but her fear of starting again, leaving the home she made and the unknown stopped her. I was fully ready to take her for myself, to treat her like a queen, something I was already doing, stupid me. She tells me she doesn’t know what she wants, that she didn’t feel safe leaving him, him being suicidal, threatening to hurt himself if she left and how would she feel if he died knowing she could stop it. If at any point anyone feels like that, please, seek professional help. I cant stress that enough.

So a couple of days after I tell her we have to stop, we resume. This time we tell old mate we are going to my buddies place, the “better half” goes to work, and we go to the shed, she had set up a love nest in there, DVD, candles, and a few other lovely touches. I’m sure old mate might have heard the roller door going up or perhaps he knew we didn’t go anywhere, coz the look he gave me said “tsk tsk”.

I had fallen hard. Seriously. She told me she wanted me, she loved my brain and my writing, and she loved the way I thrust my fuckstick and she wanted to find a way to make it work. I told her to leave him. Tell him about us, Old mate knew, “better half” had an idea but no solid foundation for his basis, everyone could see it, hell, even you could see it mate, bit you ignored what your heart and head told you to keep living in an ignorant bliss. I knew she was still fucking Him too, she denied it but I knew. I told her I understood how she felt, she had been with him for a while, he had cheated and done serious damage, abused and neglected her, she was still in love with him and  drawn to me. It hurt, It surely did, hearing them fuck, her lie about it to my face when i told her, i would say don’t lie to me, argue a little and then we would make up, usually in more ways than one.

She knew what she was doing to me, she apologised all the time, every time. I told her I understood but I couldn’t help how I feel and I wouldn’t let her forget I liked her. Perhaps I was hoping she would see how happy she was when we were together, how natural it was, how many of our friends could see the chemistry between us and how we felt about each other. It was incredible, but it was mostly one sided. Yeah she liked me, she loved the attention and the friendship but she didn’t value it.

That didn’t stop us, common sense rarely wins out over drive and we continued our affair. Tim went to bed, dale was in the shower so meg and I were making out on the couch, I told her I wanted to fuck her throat and she said “do it then” so I stood up, listened out for dale and the door and unleashed the beast. A few  minutes after we decide to go outside where we would have a bit of warning, when we would hear the door opens and see the light come on.

And so comes the hardest part for me. I confessed everything to old mate, we were drinking at the time and he asked me what was up, so I told him. I had fallen for meg, she told me the same and we were having an affair, he told me he knew, he could see it, I then told him we had slept together multiple times to which he said “you shouldn’t have told me that”. So I looked at him and asked him if he would honour the code of brotherhood and he said he would.

The next day, old mate pulls her aside and confronts her on what I told him, he said he saw her going down on me out the back and she told me he had seen, and that he told her he had seen, through the window while my pants were down and her mouth was full, so in true style we panicked. It was only a matter of time before someone let slip my dick had been places it shouldn’t, that it had been more than once and then shit would get heated. Luckily old mate kept quiet, meg and I agreed we should be more careful so we were, and we spent another round in her bed, and I just made it out the bedroom door when burger flipper walked in the front.

Another few days pass in this fashion, discreet rendezvous, sneaky bjs and good old finger banging got us by, as soon as the boys left the room, we would push our luck and make out in the lounge room, put my dick in her hand while she’s in the kitchen and pretty much anything secret lovers do. It got to the stage where we were so comfortable with our affair we would publicly hold hands, make out in the bank and in the car while waiting for “better half” to finish work. She would escort me to the video shop, we would do the same, hold hands, kiss and cuddle, whinge about the burger flipper and laugh at how blind he was to our escapades.

But then comes the day when I seriously can’t take it anymore. I tell her its over, she cries and apologies again for what we are doing. I tell her don’t apologies, you can’t help how you feel, you love him but love fucking me, I get it, I do. Its a complicated dynamic, and I’m not going to sit here while you play with My heart and dick while still fucking him. She lies and tells me she’s not, I tell her again I know. And I understand and that I’m sorry I’ve put her in this postion, that we have to stop before we get any more hurt than what we are. She agrees, we keep our distance and before long, shes back in my arms while she’s on top of me. We couldn’t stop. We tried and we failed.

So that’s as much as I’m willing to tell. If you don’t believe me that’s fine, I’ve got screenshots from messages, witnesses, and various forms of evidence. I’m sure she still has My dna in her somewhere if you want to go that far, but take my word for it. This is true. I fell for a girl who played me like a fiddle, I turned down women who would have been better for me in the hopes that something might happen with the girl who stole my heart, imagination and attention.

We had an affair and she led me on for weeks, thinking she was going to be honest and do the right thing for all of us, which is be honest. Now, I’ve told ‘better half’ tim, I’ve told old mate dale, I’ve told her best mate after we slept together on the couch, hell, I’ve even told my mother and sister about it. I thought you were genuine meg, but as tim will soon find out, you’re not.

This happened in a span of 4 weeks. This is the gist and not all of it, but the fact remains, its true, can be verified.

Posted from somewhere amongst the tangled interwebs….

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